Core Elements of Self Coaching

  

  

The Core Elements of Self Coaching

After 30 yrs. of experience, I have developed self coaching methods that work in a variety goal seeking arenas, whether in weight loss, sobriety, mastering writer’s block, procrastination and a host of other personal or business goals.

What is Self coaching

Here  are the components of self coaching: 

1. Taking the self as an object…seeing the self as an object that can be changed and  improved upon;  take the self as an object that can be acted upon and improved by your own intention. 

2. Giving your self encouragement; Listening to the admonitions of the Inner Guide and taking them seriously. (I take the Inner Guide to be equivalent to conscience, superego, or master self.) It helps as well to go back to review past accomplishments to show your self ‘you can do it’.

3. Planning and executing strategies that help you attain personalized goals 

4. Using self monitoring methods to record progress towards goals aka activity tracking; 4a. Using pre commitment techniques. (http://bit.ly/T0hpst)

 5. Assessing what works, what does not in striving efforts   6. Provide or seek out information that helps improving skills towards goal achievement. …ideas or behaviors that need to be mastered, improved upon and refined.

7. Development of intrinsic motivation. Goals that are pursued to fulfill intrinsic values are important as they are integrated into an individual’s self-concept; these are called self-concordant goals. Self-concordant goals fulfill basic needs and are aligned with an individual's true self values.  Because these goals have personal meaning to an individual and reflect an individual's self-identity, self-concordant goals are more likely to receive sustained effort over time.

Review

Take your self as an object to be changed and improved

Let your better self lead you

Listen and submit to the Inner Guide

Use the evidenced based strategies: record keeping, pre  commitment, role      models, etc.

Refer back to past accomplishments to reinforce confidence

Set up accountability partners

Get feedback from real world to correct false beliefs

Get information to refine your tools, improve, and fine tune your skills

Develop goals that are in accordance with central values and ideals to ensure intrinsic motivation. This will ensure sustained effort over time.

Even following all these guidelines, fall backs are inevitable. It is best to have self compassion in response although I have found that guilt and self criticism help get you back on the straight and narrow.

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Development and Practice of Integrity

One has integrity when he allows his beliefs to guide his conduct, where one is true to one's beliefs, where one is responsible to his values and acts in accord with them, or is willing to be held accountable for enacting his beliefs. and values

Bailing youself out of inconsistency, hypocracy by doing good in othr venues. http://bit.ly/J7Cqx8

Perhaps the surest test of an individual's integrity is his refusal to do or say anything that would damage his self-respect.
Thomas S. Monson

Developing per. Integrity

Practice truthfulness. Consider all of the relationships at home and work that will benefit from greater truthfulness. For example, if managing a team of employees, be honest and direct with each individual about your expectations and employee performance. Avoid backbiting or gossiping.

·                                 Refrain from causing harm. Part of developing personal integrity is gauging when and how to deliver the truth. Be careful not to confuse truthfulness with anger-driven and brutally honest confrontation.

Identify aspects of your behavior that require change. Reflect on your interactions with others in the workplace, at home and in social situations to determine specific areas in need of improvement. For example, if you are late for work every day and feel guilty about creating excuses for this behavior, this may be an opportunity to develop greater personal integrit

Enlist the help of others. Colleagues, relatives and friends who know you well and have your best interest at heart can assist your progress by providing objective feedback on a daily basis about the personal changes you are making.

Assess your progress. Developing personal integrity is a trial and error process that requires persistent effort. Ask yourself on a daily or weekly basis if you are making progress.

Face the obstacles that cause you to lie or violate your moral code. This might involve finding a more suitable job, facing your fears about how others may perceive you and/or seeking out counseling to address emotional challenges and insecurities

Determine your reasons for not behaving with greater personal integrity. For example, you may be pushing unpleasant work tasks on to other employees instead of being honest with your boss about your inability to do the tasks. You may be afraid to admit to yourself or to your boss that you do not possess the right skills or that the job is not the right fit for you.

Make a list of tasks and behaviors in which you will become more trustworthy. The list might range from basic tasks, such as taking out the trash as promised to repaying large sums of money in a timely manner.