Inner and Outer Sources of Authoritative Commands

In reading the latest book by Jonathan Franzen, Purity, the main character at one point pleads with her lover to tell her what to do because she knows this about herself: she likes to be directed by others, especially those she admires because of their status or power.

This passage suggested the comparative strength of authoritative commands from different quarters, for example, the ones emanating from one’s conscience versus those from outside sources: teachers, bosses, institutional authorities, friends, professionals, and so forth.

The power of commands varies all over the map, but what interests me is how you can strengthen commands coming from your inner guide, conscience, master self…whatever label you prefer to use in naming the voice or entity that declares what is good or right from within.

I raise this question because I am aware of my own resistance to self-leadership and suspect that if one is serious about personal change, in habits, in altering addictions, or pursuing any positive goal one has to learn to submit and comply with one’s inner voice.

After all we are accustomed to following the advice and recommendations of outer authorities, though not always sedulously, especially professionals like doctors, lawyers and other so called experts. Why can’t this be as easy when giving attention to one’s conscience?

I believe this is because you have not yet accepted your conscience as your savior. People need to accept the conscience or inner guide as their personal savior just as they might defer to their will power, therapeutic ideology or some kind of religious faith. Alcoholics Anonymous has enshrined submission to a ‘higher power’ as necessary for change; submission to one’s conscience seems to me a perfectly acceptable alternative for those inclined to a more secular direction.

Fear is at the bottom of reluctance to follow the inner guide or conscience.  Fear of failure, of rejection and fear of disapproval constitute the pillars of resistance and until they are managed change is impossible. The strategies for doing this may be behavioral and cognitive, but until they are brought into play, be ready for fall backs. As R.  Baumeister, D. Kirschenbaum and others have argued, self-regulatory failure is the norm so expectations for advance should be modest.

Strengthening the call of the conscience is helped if you have a framework to understand the struggle. In my experience this can be done by looking at what the conscience recommends and examine how you have felt in the past when you have followed those recommendations. Usually I have felt elation, bliss and positive self-regard, the mother’s milk of further effort.

With these outcomes, it is not hard to be persuaded to undertake new resistance prone endeavors; the rewards have already been identified and enjoyed from past projects.